A bit brave

   At Andy’s Man Club everything is confidential. ‘What is said in the meeting stays in the meeting.’ Men are there to share their problems and get support and advice.  But friendships are developed and WhatsApp conversations come thick and fast. A recent question by one fella led to a series of replies that were honest and open and show the wide range of personal difficulties that mental health brings. With their permission, I am publishing the exchanges in this blog.   For the guys that have panic attacks, how did the first one start??? Mine was being in a place I didn't want to be and people telling me to calm down. It’s the words calm down that’s a trigger for me. If I remember the first correctly, I had knots in my stomach then chest feeling like a heart attack, sweaty palms, sweaty face, feeling of the place becoming smaller and me becoming bigger. Itching and feeling paranoid. Hope you're OK mate. Yeah, I’m ok, I went sweaty but it was more my body shutting dow

When you have anxiety and or depression it is hard to think of anything but those immediate feelings that flood through you and make thinking impossible. You just want it to stop, there and then. You concentrate on the thoughts that have made you ill. You catastrophise and all the negative thoughts cascade through your mind. You want to cry or scream, to be held tight and reassured. You are embarrassed by your needy behaviour and believe that no one will understand, not the doctors, your family, or your friends. You think you will be judge and condemned because you are judging yourself so negatively. The people that really understand you are the ones who are going through mental health issues themselves. Today I am at that point but I’m not going to let the negative feelings win. Today I am acting and thinking positively. I know I can text my mates in Andy’s Man Club but first I will try to find a way through myself. I recognise that this fear and blackness comes from this moment.