The pain of loss and the joy of remembering
It’s now a year since Isaac died but the grief remains strong. Sometimes I can think of him calmly and regret that he has gone. At other times almost like a flash of lightning, I get an intense feeling of loss and at that moment I can’t imagine he is still not with us. All the overwhelming and varied emotions I felt when he first passed are there. That feeling is triggered by a memory so quick and instant that I can’t identify it. I am ambushed by my inner self and left feeling hopelessly adrift and physically drained for the day. I want to remember Isaac but not like that. He was such a delight and a joy to be around. This is what I try to concentrate on when I think of Isaac. I always smile when I recall his mum trying to teach Isaac the more complex concepts of time and number. The lovely thing about Isaac is that he understood a great deal but never quite grasped everything fully. I was playing with him when his mum said that it was bedtime, but he was enjoying himself and he