Writing and talking as Therapy more reflections


Writing and talking as therapy.

Over time I have adapted my thinking in an effort to come to terms with, if not conquer my illness. One way to help myself is to write. Two books, many short stories, poems, and one half-finished novel have kept me occupied and allowed me to express difficult emotions. I feel privileged that I can write because I understand that many people don’t have the ideas or skills to do this. Talking has also been very helpful but many men continue to see this as unmanly and suicides of young men remain high. Some refer to this as ‘toxic masculinity’. These are the societal and cultural pressures on men to be strong and determined. Asking for help and talking to other men is seen as a weakness but things are changing. Andy’s Man Club, where men talk openly to other men, represents a major step forward. I attend a group each Monday and I have met many brave men talking about their feelings and expectations. 
Sometimes I can feel brave and other times I feel I am falling apart. At my Book Launch, people saw a strong confident person making the audience laugh and enjoying every moment but  I often feel that I am not one person but two, hence my poem: I am two people’.
I am two people
The first is strong and brave,
An adult who you can lean on.
I LOVE YOU
A man who cares,
A father, husband, who can be relied upon.
I GIVE YOU MY LOVE.
A leader who is certain, confident and immense.
A person who can be admired and followed
ASK ME AND I WILL GIVE.
I am two people,
The second is hidden from view
A small child with real and imagined fears
LOVE ME
A man with inner turmoil,
A boy with more questions than answers,
HOLD ME
A man who has lost his way,
A man who has opened a door that cannot be closed.
HELP ME.

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