Don't play Top Trumps
It is hard not to compare yourself with others when you see
people who appear to be enjoying their lives and have no problems. This is
rarely the case and mental health problems do affect a large percentage of the
population at some time in their lives. Some people can identify what is
causing them problems and deal with it and so the illness is short-lived. Some
people need medication to lift them and repair them but usually, it also needs a
clear understanding of what has happened to them in their lives. All this takes
time and sometimes money. There are many people however, who suffer from mental
illness all of their lives, and the majority learn to live with the accompanying
ups and downs. Talking to others is a big help in survival but is not a cure. I
listen on occasions to people who are surviving against all the odds and I
admire their fortitude and determination. It would be easy for me to look at
these people and think, ‘I am not that bad, what have I got to complain about?’
When I meet with other men, this is a statement often made. ‘I am not sure why I
am here because there are many here who are in a much worse position than me.’
The response is always the same. ‘Don’t play top trumps.’
There is no hierarchy for different mental illnesses. There are no personal
circumstances that excuse or create how you feel. You are ill and your views
and feelings are as valid as anyone else’s. What you are going through is for
you intense and destructive and you are deserving of as much help as anyone
else. Once someone understands this they stop apologising for their condition
and start to talk openly about how they feel. Some of us may have a longer road
to travel than others but everyone is deserving in their own way.
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