Speak Out by Lee Powell

 

Sertraline/citalopram/mirtazapine/fluoxetine. So if you’re unlucky enough to know what these tablets are, then I don't have to describe to you what this post is regarding. But if you don't I will fill you in. That medication allows people to deal with a normal day to day life. Although most days it leaves them tired, spaced out and emotionless. Crazy right? Why would anyone want to feel like that? Well, this is why. You see some people suffer from depression and anxiety. In their brain it doesn't sit right, something seems different. They notice little differences that 'normal' people wouldn't notice. That comment you didn't tag then in, but you tagged other people? They see that, and say to themselves why didn't you tag me? What's up with me? You read that message they sent and they see that you did, but you didn't reply. Why didn't you reply? And they feel like they have done something to upset you. You didn't say I love you on the phone. Do you not love them anymore? Do you love someone else instead? They just made a comment about them Was it a joke? Was that person supposed to laugh? Or did they mean it? Are they being nice? Are they talking about them? Do they talk about them? And they then think I bet they don’t like me really. They say sorry all the time. They feel like they annoy everyone. And for all those questions they will spend hours trying to answer. Let it all build up in their mind until it sends them into tears...... it's mental that isn't it!!! That they see things that way. It's not only mental changes but physical changes. They don't eat a lot, mainly rubbish, because they need it now and need the energy from lack of sleep. Insomnia, up all night answering questions to situations that don't even exist, or sleep too much and waste half their day still feeling tired. They still smile and they have every excuse for when you ask why. But the tablets can help them because they know when they start to feel this way or think this way, they need help. They know that when their behaviour starts to change. They need guidance.  And they understand that they don't need to be ashamed. They don't need to be understood. They just need to be accepted. Everyone is fighting a battle and sometimes you need to be kinder. So I may just be another person who's talking about mental health. Living with this illness is hard, but trying to understand it, is even harder. It’s also 100 times harder if they have another condition on top of this such as being on the autistic spectrum. Don't suffer in silence. Speak out.


 

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