Reducing Medication

 


I have never worried about taking tablets for anxiety and depression but my present dosage is as high as it has ever been. It has helped me through some difficult times and allowed me to make the most of my counselling. Everything has been going well in recent weeks despite the pandemic and lockdown, and so my doctor thought it was time to reduce my medication. I was comfortable with that and agreed to reduce one of the two tablets I was taking. I felt confident that I was getting better and all the other factors in my life were looking good. Summer was coming. I had plans to see my daughters and in a couple of weeks, I’d be swimming again. So three weeks ago I reduced the medication I take at night from one tablet to half a dose, thinking I’d reduce it again after a week. It took two weeks for the withdrawal symptoms to subside and during that time I felt tearful most of the time. For the last five days, I have had no night-time tablet and at the moment I feel dreadful. The tablet did help with my sleep so now I am waking up early and not going back to sleep. I feel very tired and extremely down. The least thing gets me angry and simple tasks are hard work. So here I am, wondering if I am doing the right thing. At my most logical, I understand that this is the correct course of action but I am not always at my most logical. My emotional self wants to rush back to the tablet so I can feel better again but I know this is not the answer. The feelings of withdrawal are not much different from the illness itself, so I have to remind myself that some of these emotions are not me but the reduction in my meds. When I feel at my worst I can easily drag myself into that hole I have spent the past two years climbing out of. I intend to go back on half dose for the next week until I have attended an important complaints’ meeting on behalf of my wife. Then I will try again because I am determined to get better. I start swimming next week and it won’t be long before I’m back at a face-to-face Andy’s Man Club. What I do know is that I will have to be brave because this might be the hardest thing I have ever done.

 

 

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